Since I decided to turn my life around in terms of how active I was last year, I’ve had my fair share of highs and lows (and I’m not talking about my weight). Things can get tough in life and sometimes things snowball a little and I end up not going to Evolve MMA as regularly as I’d like or forgetting about doing that 5km jog after work just because I’m losing motivation and steam. Then, suddenly one day once I kick myself in the butt to get moving, I get such an endorphin boost just staying on the move, working out.
Like most working adults, I spend 10 hours of my day (plus minus) travelling and working. That leaves me with 14 hours of time to figure out how much of it I spend recuperating and how much of it goes into my varied hobbies and interests which range from blogging to photography to picking up a new skill like diving. With working out coming into the picture last year, I’m pretty much stuck with very little time and it’s all about squeezing it and managing my time well. Some days I fail at it terribly because I’m beyond burnt and everything just tumbles down causing a domino chain effect that extends into other parts of my life. Then on other days, it’s like I’m on a roll and everything just falls into place. When this happens, I know all the struggle has been absolutely worth it.
With a lifestyle like that, sometimes my mood dips really low when people tell me they’ve not got time to do something or when they complain incessantly about their own problems which stem from their lack of time management (and a complete lack of reality) instead of working on it. It makes me even more frustrated when I have to work with people like that. In my opinion, it really is about what your priorities are. I find it hard to understand someone who doesn’t put in the effort to sort things out and instead chooses to mope, whine and wait on someone else to put things right in their lives.
I’m not saying now that I think everyone should do things my way, but it’s just that I don’t see how making excuses in life is the way to go. It’s just not my way and anyone is welcome to live a life they feel works for them, but for every minute I sit there listening and trying to understand the multitude of self-inflicted issues someone chooses to talk about instead of do something about, I am making a choice out of love and concern to spend that limited remaining 12 hours of my life with them. While doing that is part of being a good friend, perhaps sometimes it’s inevitable to turn the tables and think would that person do the same for me.
Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results
That to me is what repeated whining, complaining and excuse making is: insanity. And it is also insane of me to expect things to change in a friendship, relationship or working partnership when the same thing is done over and over again in it.
That is why I feel this year I’ve changed. I decided this year to do everything I’ve done differently in order to maintain my inner balance and to stop creating a self-conjured burden from my own inability to let things and people go. If I have changed the way I’ve tried to interact with a person and yet nothing changes for the better, perhaps it’s better for me to look inside and have a think if I should just change the way I view that particular relationship and circumstance. I have the power to make things better for myself and others, but I do still have to put myself in the front now and then so that I won’t be weighed down by negativity, anger or frustration. Whether that is a choice others can accept, I have only myself and my God to answer to.
Anyhow, I take it as spring cleaning for a brand new year. It’s already March and there’s awesome things that can be achieved with the remaining nine months of the year. Come on, nine months is pretty much enough time to develop a baby! Perhaps it’s time for me to be pregnant with ideas and inspiration and to birth something I will love and be proud of.
The first step to doing that? Just clear my mind, look inwards, put my foot out, get active and let a world in monochrome open up into a world of colour.